Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Deep thoughts before bed

Sometimes, I wonder if things don't happen for a reason; if there's something or someone out there helping stuff along. Like, at some point, there is going to be a change in your life that will lead you down some path, and if that's the wrong path, something happens that you can respond to in some way to either continue down that wrong path, or alter it correct again. It's when stuff like this happens that I think there might be some higher power, or at least some other power. If you're wondering what has brought about this bout of existentialism, I'll tell you.

This evening, after working at PetCo, I ran to the grocery store to pick up some essentials for the next day. Mind you, it's about 10pm when I'm shopping. I was listening to my iPod in the car, and I liked the song that was playing, so I put my headphones in and listened to it while shopping as well. I was in the self checkout lane, checking myself ya do, and after I was done, the lady in line came up to my register. I still had my headphones on, but I acknowledged her, and she started talking. I took my headphone off and she was asking for help using the self checkout, she didn't know how. Now, there are obviously people around for this very purpose, but I know how to work them, and I was standing right there, so I helped her. We got her all checked out and we went on our separate ways.

Now, I'm a thinky think sort of person, as anyone who knows me could tell you, so I started wondering. Did she want me to help her because I had my headphones on, off in my owl little world, cut off from the rest of humanity going on in the store? she could have gone to an empty register and asked an employee for help, or one of the other patrons checking out, but she asked me. I saw her let a guy go ahead of her, presumably so I could help her. Did she decide this on her own, to pull me back into the world, or did something put the seed of this idea in her head. If she hadn't asked for my help, and I had walked out of the store, still listening to my music, would something else had happened? Something bad right then, or further on down the road. Maybe this one act of keeping myself apart from others would have started me on a path of recluseivness that I wouldn't be able to stop. Maybe this woman saved me from myself in some little way. Or, maybe she just liked the look of me, I was the only woman at the checkout, the rest were guys. I guess we'll never know.